Character over comfort

Back in the beginning of 2020 when I was still in high school, I wrote myself a note. Yes, I wrote MYSELF a note- but technically it was for God..I'll explain.

I was sitting at my desk listening to one of my classes...I attended a Christian school (Abeka), so I remember that I was listening to my Bible class (it was a mandatory class- but my favorite) and I don't even remember the lesson or the message or anything...but it must have been pretty good, because I remember opening up my desk drawer, pulling out a piece of scrap paper, and writing on it:

"God, 

When I start college in the fall, I'm gonna be pretty busy and I'm going to be having a lot going on. Please help me to keep you first in everything I do and help me to not forget what really matters and what doesn't... no matter what You have to do- help my relationship with You grow."

It didn't seem like much to me. I wrote it and kept on listening to my class- I do remember though thinking in my head "What if I really do get caught up in so much other stuff that I forget what matters." It kind of scared me to be honest and I think that's what compelled me to write that. Afterwards, I stuck the note in one of my bibles and forgot about it. 

Fast forward to now- I've been in college for almost a whole year now and let me just tell you...

Don't ask God for something like that and expect Him not to do it...

Please hear me when I say that as far as my life goes.. I have nothing to whine about. I have a nice house, car, parents that love me, etc. etc..but having all those things doesn't automatically equal that you are happy. I have always been a worrier..like my entire life..and when you are a worrier you come up with these scenarios of what could happen and most of the time those things never happen..but what happens when scenarios that you never even thought would happen end up happening..

Ever since I wrote that note I can honestly say that I have gone through more and grown more as a person then I have in my entire life..and we're talking I wrote this note only a year ago. It's easy for me to think "Wow I have been through so much, God must be mad at me..." or "What is He thinking??" but it's not that. He's done exactly what I asked Him to do. If I wrote that note, then never went through anything since then I probably wouldn't have talked to Him as much honestly. I mean yeah I still would have but not as much. The different things that have happened have forced me to talk to Him, because it's forced me to realize I am a mess without Him and can do nothing on my own... because here is what I have learned: 

God doesn't care about your comfort- He cares about your character.

Character isn't built in comfort zones- it's built when everything around you is falling apart and you have to decide what you're gonna do about it. 

Some people might say "Well of course God wants me to be comfortable!" But I would say that is just not the case. Today, many like to say that being a Christian is easy, you simply just read your Bible and try to do the best you can and it'll be a walk in the park. Look at Jesus' life though. Was He ever really comfortable? If we look at His life- God's own Son's life and see how hard it was- why do we expect ours to be any different? 

I don't want this blog to only ever be me talking about going through things- but aren't we always constantly going through things?

The truth is- God is more interested in making our life holy than He is making our life happy..

Look at it this way:

-Grapes must be crushed to make wine.

-Diamonds form under pressure.

-Olives are pressed to release oil.

-Seeds grow in darkness.

So whenever you feel crushed, under pressure, pressed, or in darkness- trust that you are in a place of transformation.

Write God a note like that and watch what happens in your life in a year.. I promise you will be in an entirely different place mentally and spiritually.